Heartbroken
The relationship I have with my dad is so complex, and has been through many phases. At times the relationship has been very strained. Somewhere between the tear filled long distance phone calls and the hugs in airports my dad and I found our way back to each other. He will always be the guy in my life.
Always be the one that I will try to impress.
Always the one that I will look for acceptance from.
Always the one that I fear will never know how much he truly means to me.
This morning my dad called to tell me that one of his colleagues had passed away. I could here the agony in his voice as the news hit us both a little too close to home. Ron is the dad to a high school friend of mine and a close friend of our family. He had an infectious laugh and was one of the most sincerest people I knew. The prestigious doctor ego was lost on him. I loved him for being such an amazing friend to my dad. I loved him for being such an amazing dad to my friend.
Tonight, Emily is going to sleep without her dad being a phone call away. She will have to eventually go back to work and know that her dad is no longer one of her coworkers. She is going to be a mom in a few months and her dad won’t be there to see his first grandchild. How is any of that fair? How is any one person expected to handle that much heartbreak?
I have no words of inspiration. No words to make any of this okay. Instead, I, myself, go to bed tonight with a heavy heart and a tear filled pillow. This is hitting way too close and is shedding a light on my inability to tell my own dad how much I need him to always be in my life.
Emily, with her dad and husband.
I pray for understanding and peace for you and your family tonight and in the many days to come.
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August 9th, 2009 at 8:31 am
Heartbreaking. They are blessed to have someone like you in their life.
August 10th, 2009 at 1:32 pm
Michelle, please reassure your friend (and yourself) that while this pain may seem unsurmountable now, God heals all wounds. It is never fair to lose someone you love to soon in life, but I can tell you first hand, when I see characteristics of my Mom in Eliza Grace, that just because they are not here on earth does not mean they are not forever with us in our hearts. Take the time to tell your Dad how much you love him and how much he means to you. You can never tell him enough! Trust me on that one. Much love!
August 11th, 2009 at 7:44 pm
I am praying for Emily and her family… I would love to talk to you someday soon because I so understand that relationship with your father. Ya might be surprised
Would love to hear your story more and hopefully encourage you a little with mine and my dad's!
I agree w/ Eric that they are so blessed to have you in their life and I know that God will come wrap His arms around them in their time of need, as well as you.